HTales from the Table


The Botch-O-Matic

Posted on November 24, 2015

A good friend announced he was running D&D 3rd ed mid-level module and invited me to play. Excited, I went to our local hobby shop and bought a new set of dice. They were a pretty marbleized red with white numbers that would soon become the bane of my existence.

The D6s lulled me into a false sense of security as I put together a pretty solid Rogue. Well into the game, things were going well as we came to a hallway. There were four obvious Glyphs on the walls, so it was up to me to check them out and disarm them.

First one up: Natural 1. Turns out is it's a Fire Seal.

Reflex Save? Another Botch.

We laugh and at this point…

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First Team Kill

Posted on November 23, 2015

My uncle used to host a D&D campaign when my cousins came to visit. I was the Human Warrior, my brother was an Elven Wizard, Fran a Human Ranger, Nik a Dwarven Cleric, and JD an Elven Warmage.

The adventure was simple. We were tasked with delivering a message to another kingdom. I figured it was so easy there was no way for us to screw it up.

I was wrong.

As our characters set up camp next to a forest, the DM sent a large group of spiders to attack us. I rushed in and managed to kill the first one. That is when it went to hell.

My brother and JD cast Web spells to contain the spiders. However, I got caught up in the web…

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Epic Meal Time

Posted on November 22, 2015

One of the first quests we embarked on was helping an old blind Witch who could point the way we needed to continue. The Witch had a number of tasks for us to do to help with her preparations, which ultimately ended with her being very hungry and needing something to eat before she could cast the final divination spell. She informed us there was a local farm nearby that we could get a chicken from, but gravely warned us not to get caught by the farmer.

Figuring a little 'borrowing' couldn't hurt, especially if we left some gold behind, we set off in the dead of night to sneak into this farmer's yard.

We quickly found the flock,…

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Rolling Too Well

Posted on November 19, 2015

This is a tale of my friend's first time DMing. Now he is an experienced and brutal DM, but at the time, he was a bit wobbly and experimental. He had created a whole new campaign world for his first time (always a risky choice when you're first learning the ropes), and had even created a magic mishandling chart.

The idea of the chart was that magic in his partially steam punk-ish setting was wonky, constantly in flux. You rolled every time you cast a spell. If you rolled middling, the spell went off, maybe with a minor beneficial or not so beneficial modifier depending on whether you were on the high or low side of middling. If…

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Tall Tipping

Posted on November 18, 2015

There was once a Halfling Rogue that liked to play pranks on humans. For fun he would sneak into the houses of humans, push them out of their beds while they slept, and run away, cackling while the humans cursed up a storm.

After enough 'Tall' townspeople complained to the Half-Orc Lord of the town, there was a small bounty placed on him.

The Little Rogue did not like this, so he gathered up his great charisma (16) and went to the rest of the Halflings in the city and convinced them to join in his nightly game.

With a proclamation that he would tip the Lord with their help and forever be recognized as the true prank masters…

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