Tales

Original or Extra Crispy

Posted on June 14, 2018

We were playing a custom D&D game, where we had to play as either orcs or goblins and use makeshift weapons. Two of us were orcs, while myself and another were goblins.

Our first mission was to kill all the inhabitants of a small village. I was the one chosen to sneak in and investigate before we made plans and attacked. Creeping through the town, I managed to get near the center before I failed a roll and was spotted.

Panicked, the villagers sounded the alarm and fled into the church while the guards and my group rushed to my position. Lucky for me, my party arrived first, and we pushed the guards back to the church. During the mad…

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The Glorious Goddess

Posted on June 13, 2018

I DM a bi-weekly game in which my party has been walking through the challenges I place before them without breaking a sweat.

Case in point, one of my players single-handedly two-shot a creature 3 levels higher than him. I'd noticed that in order to challenge my players, I would have to place my party in a difficult situation. With this in mind I set an ambush for them.

Five goblins were waiting on the road in an openly threatening fashion, with about thirty or so waiting in the wings. I'd figured a well-strategized coordinated attack from about thirty-five to forty goblins would give the party an appropriate, fun, and maybe even ch…

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Pick a God, Any God

Posted on June 12, 2018

I was running a 3.5 D&D game and getting ready to convert to 5th edition when a player provided me with perfect in-game reason for a subtle reset. I don't like killing my PCs, so I always give them a chance to be saved. The house rule for 3.5 was that if a player was taken down to (or past) -10 hit points, they could be saved (stabilized at -10), but only if a healer could get to them and make a DC 10 Healing check before the end of the turn. That usually gave them a fair chance... usually.

Their last adventure in 3.5 culminated in a battle between a powerful Rogue that could step in and out of the ethereal plane, and a group of cult…

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Dragon’s Vengeance

Posted on June 11, 2018

I was DMing for a group of my friends using an online game engine, as we were all scattered around the country. I had spent lots of time getting the pieces right and setting up all the fights beforehand so I could just drop the needed tokens on the map for my group.

During one game, the group was tasked with collecting materials to build a magic compass in order to find the Lich King's hidden island. One of the materials needed were several fangs from some snow dragons. The group trekked up the mountain and just destroyed all the fights I had set up, laughing all the way.

In reality I had made all the earlier encounters a little eas…

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The Great Lemon Heist

Posted on June 05, 2018

We were playing D&D 3.5 with a lot of House Rules. Our party consists of myself as a Halfling Rogue; a Halfling Scout; a Half-Orc Fighter; and a Human Warlock.

We started out as young characters in a street gang inside a very tough port city. As level-ones, we did menial tasks for the gang, and we didn’t earn much gold. So when we learned that as a port city, the value of lemons was 5 silver each (as they were easily stored on ships and needed for nutrition), we decided to steal some.

We met with a foreign ship's Quartermaster and struck a deal for 400 lbs of lemons at 2.3 silver for each lemon—roughly 588 gold worth of lemons. Our …

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