Every Bit of XP Helps

Posted on August 03, 2018

Gather close friends as I tell you the tale of Ledo's Traveling Circus. You've heard some of the exploits of this group before, such as a certain story involving a Pirate and a Gelatinous Cube, and others about... well, we'll get to that. For now, let's get into this story.

In our travels, our group had stumbled across an old, abandoned Dwarven ruin and, like any good adventurers, stumbled in looking for loot. We wandered around killing some baddies for a while, until we found a mural depicting a number of Dwarves scattered around a landscape with various other items, such as weapons and bits of treasure. We couldn’t help but notice how realistic the mural looked; it was absolutely stunning.

Around this time, we found that the mural in question wasn’t actually solid, and that we could reach inside of it. We were messing around with the mural, while another player passed notes to the DM.

Then someone looked deep into the mural and saw something truly concerning:

"Is that... Smidget?"

Yes, this was Smidget's group. And yes, he of course leaped straight into the mural once he realized he could to secure the shinies within. And of course he immediately got stuck inside.

Fortunately for him, Runt was just strong enough to pull Smidget safely out of the mural, so Smidget got off the hook. This time.

He spent the remainder of this quest searching every nook and cranny of the ruins for loot (rather unsuccessfully).

We explored the Ruins some more until we found another mural. This one just depicted a Dwarf sitting atop a throne wearing a crown. Now that we had found the head honcho, it was a simple matter to have Runt yank him out.

A bit dazed, the Dwarf confirmed that he was in fact the leader of these particular Dwarves. He explained that they had been attacked by two Black Dragons, and they had used a strange mirror to trap the Dwarves within the murals. He asked us to help them defeat the dragons and free all the trapped Dwarves.

This was all well and good, but some aspects of his stories sound strange, so the leader of the group, a Samurai named Suto, asked him what year it is.

The Dwarf gave him a date about 3,000 years in the past.

There was a bit of an awkward silence, some strange glances, and awkward coughs.

“What?” asked the Dwarf.

“I don't know how to tell you this,” said Suto, “but I think you and your people have been stuck in those murals for three thousand years.”

At this point the DM rolled some dice.

“Yeah... he's dead,” said the DM

“What?” our group shouted.

“System shock. His heart couldn't take it.”

Despite being a Dwarf with constitution out the rear, he botched his System Shock so badly that he just collapsed and died right there. The group started to panic, then quickly searched for any resurrection magic we had on hand, while worrying about the consequences of our actions and such. Then, one of the quieter players in the group spoke up.

“Wait, wait, wait, I have a question!”

Everyone stopped and looked at him.

“How much XP does Suto get for the Dwarf?”

Once everyone had finished laughing, the DM awarded Suto 3,000 XP for the Dwarf.

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