Ignorance is a Powerful Weapon

Posted on October 15, 2018

I once had the joy of playing an epic level Chaotic Good Warlock named Vargranakh. While he tried to do whatever he thought was good, he had a fundamental lack of understanding of how the law worked. So whenever someone tried to impose punishment on him, he would make it as difficult as possible.

The best example of this was when the party visited the Gnome capital city, Steamcrag—a flying mechanical metropolis. Due to the time constraints we had because of our quest, we went to the highest authority there, who turned out to simply be the wealthiest person in town.

We went to his house and asked the guards outside to let us see him. They told us to wait about ten minutes. My Warlock had other plans, though.

Ever since Vargranakh entered the city he was mesmerized with everything mechanical, despite having no idea how anything worked. When he was told to wait outside the house, he took a great interest in the Tesla Rifle that the guard used. He snatched it out of the Gnome's hands and started examining it. The other guard fired his rifle at the Warlock to make him stop.

It would have worked if not for a ring that made him immune to electricity, which he’d looted a few sessions earlier.

The guards decided to call in backup to apprehend him. Within a minute he was surrounded by twenty Gnome police officers. They quickly cuffed him and dragged him off to jail. When he arrived in the cells, Vargranakh decided he was bored, so he slipped out of his hand cuffs. The guards then came and told him to remove his gear. He refused. They decided to then fire on him to make him submit.

When that failed they ran away to get more backup. With them out of the way, Vargranakh exited the jail, only to find a Gnomish SWAT team waiting for him. He simply teleported 50 feet past them and walked off, leaving an illusion of himself in the process.

The SWAT team fired their weapons and threw stun grenades at the illusion, only to find that nothing worked. They unanimously called him a monster and scattered, sounding the towns emergency alarm that forced everyone to flee the city en mass via airships.

So that is how I accidentally vacated an entire capital city through non-violence and a complete lack of understanding about the law.

Submit your own Tales from the Table!

Please Note: By submitting your story you agree that we can publish it on the Internet and on other mediums if the opportunity arises. The names and events may be edited to protect the innocent.