Tales

It Ain’t Easy Being Chaotic Evil

Posted on April 14, 2017

Chanos Odal was a chaotic evil Wizard with a horrendously low constitution and unimpressive strength and dexterity. His group mates were both questionably neutral: a Dragon-blooded Sorceress and a Bard with a silver tongue. Those two have many heroic and heartbreaking tales in their quests for personal power and the usual saving-the-world, while Chanos' own tales tend toward the absurd. Not that I played him as a jester, but his over-the-top supervillainy often collapsed on itself, when it wasn't being foiled by his own companions.

The first time Chanos died, the group was still quite poor for being level 11. The Sorceress and Bard couldn't imagine hawking their hard-earned equipment to pay for the resurrection, and Chanos' own coin had mostly been spent on intangibles or items which would be... complicated to find buyers for. The Bard—with his godlike ability to lie and affection for putting Chanos in delicate situations—decided to convince a travelling High Priest of Moradin that this ill soul needed saving and a chance to redeem itself.

Chanos woke from the dead in the bed of an inn, naked, with a jovial Dwarf standing over him. The priest insisted on a conversation over drinks before he would allow the Wizard to leave. Two drinks and two epic fortitude saves vs alcohol later, Chanos had managed to lie his way free from the Dwarf and ran from the inn... wearing only a bedsheet in the middle of a crowded city. The city folk whispered prayers under their breath, covered their childrens' eyes, or wretched at the sight of the Wizard as he rushed to the nearest clothier.

Panicked, winded and drunk, Chanos slammed and locked the door behind him and demanded the shopkeeper lend him a set of clothes. The shopkeeper, disgusted, refused. Chanos invoked his name (he had some renown in the city, as the party had already saved it once) but the shopkeeper still refused, not believing that the great Wizard Chanos Odal could be such a pathetic figure, and naked to boot.

So Chanos attacked. Newly resurrected, naked, drunk, and unarmed, Chanos' assault was pathetic. He leapt at the clothier, who drew a sword from behind the counter. Chanos was nearly dead again before he managed to kill the level 2 commoner in a grapple, and I'm still not sure that the DM didn't fudge a few rolls to keep the Wizard alive. Newly clothed, clinging to the sword he had stolen, Chanos returned to his party's rooms at their patron's manor, collected his things, and was promptly knocked unconscious when he threatened the Bard for putting him in the situation in the first place.

He awoke in prison (not for the first time) arrested for the Bard stealing a carriage under his name.

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