Tales

Oil of Acid Resistance

Posted on November 06, 2017

Through the 10+ years of playing my AD&D Dwarven Fighter with monk-like tendencies named Roke, I have gathered a huge number of trophies, items, and stories—like getting an entire Dwarven city drunk in a contest, or liberating a village by myself using a dead guard as my weapon. But none are as valuable as making our DM say something another DM hasn’t ever had to say. Feel free to follow the recipe.

It all started when our full party got together after a period of separation. One half had come back with word of a Red Dragon guarding a long-abandoned airship which started our newest quest. However, more than just the airship, Roke wanted ALL the dragon he could get without damaging the hide, as was typical in a standard brawl. We all did. So, the players being engineers, mathematicians, and gamers all, spent over two hours looking at our inventory and found the following relevant spells and materials: Teleport, Itemize, and a custom fly spell called Supa' Fly (faster, more maneuverable) from our Mages; Protection from Fire and Wraith Form from our specialty Priest; a portable hole, and an Oil of Acid Resistance. Then we went out and found our final ingredient, a huge boulder.

We worked it out and told the DM our full plan:

  1. We’d cast Itemize on the boulder and use the optional “make it like cloth” bit.

  2. Cover it, a Mage, and the portable hole in the Oil of Acid Resistance.

  3. Put the Mage and the small boulder in the portable hole, roll it up, and hand it off to the specialty Priest.

  4. Cast Protection from Fire, Supa' Fly, and Wraith Form on the Priest, and send him after the dragon.

  5. Fly through the mouth/nose of the dragon, land in its stomach, open the hole, fly out ‘the back’.

  6. The Mage comes out, pulls the cloth boulder out, sticks it where ever, rolls the hole up, uses Teleport to get out.

  7. Once on land, cancel Itemize—exploding the dragon from the inside, leaving its skin fully intact.

Our DM listened to our plan and thought of all the ways he could around it. “You know she can see through magic.”

“We know. The Protection of Fire is for the breath weapon attack.”

“What about the stomach acid?”

“That's what the Oil of Acid Resistance is for,” I replied.

Another long minute. “You know, I spent a lot of time working the ins and outs of this fight out, and you want it to come down to a single attack roll from the dragon? I don't know what to tell you other than 'You do that.'”

“Kind of the goal.”

He saw us live through the only attack the dragon could get off before he reluctantly gave up the real treasure, defeated and annoyed. “Fine. You kill the Red Dragon. But you are NEVER getting another Oil of Acid Resistance.”

Submit your own Tales from the Table!

Please Note: By submitting your story you agree that we can publish it on the Internet and on other mediums if the opportunity arises. The names and events may be edited to protect the innocent.

×