HTales from the Table

Tales

The Atheist Elf

Posted on January 05, 2017

Jakk'tril the Elf was an atheist. It wasn't that he didn't believe that gods like Pelor or Corellon didn't exist—just that he didn't care to pray and he didn't think that they cared either way. So it seemed odd when the rest of the party was praying all the time. The Cleric made sense—she was a Cleric, praying is what they do. But one Rogue kept offering sacrifices to Olidammara and later/more frequently to Vecna. The other Rogue kept praying to some chaotic god whose name Jakk'tril never bothered to remember. Our Sorcerer was even whispering prayers to Pelor (though in retrospect, every time he spoke Pelor's name, he coughed in a way that sounded suspiciously like "Tiamat.") Being a respectful elf, Jakk'tril didn't question anything and went about his business—being an agile meat shield—and left the faithful to their respective faiths.

Skip ahead a few sessions. We were exploring an ancient tomb and activated a magical statue that summoned two Angels. They were totally cool with Jakk'tril and the Cleric, but started freaking out at the Rogues (fair, they were overtly evil) and the Sorcerer (for reasons unknown). A fight broke out and it became clear that we stood no chance. Our Cleric was praying to Pelor to get the Angels to stop, but her prayers went unheeded. We would surely die.

Jakk'tril had had enough. He shouted at the top of his lungs, "@#%$, Pelor! I pray to whatever god will listen!" I rolled. The die came up 20.

The Angels vanished. Jakk'tril the atheist Elf fell to his knees in the divine presence of his new god—Moradin, creator god of the Dwarves.

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