Tales

When Stealing a Sarcophagus Make Sure it is Empty

Posted on May 10, 2018

In the years I’ve been running my D&D game I have found it’s a really smart thing to keep a tabulation of what loot the party has won, found, or stolen, as most gamers tend to forget the minor and sometimes important details that can lead to embarrassment, dismemberment or other general nastiness that may unwind the mortal coil.

Case in point, about a year ago (real time) the party of up-and-coming heroes finally got something they had been pining for—a crawl through a fantasy version of an Egyptian-style pyramid. Gathering from various mythologies, history, and fantasy stories, I put together a decent pyramid crawl full of traps, strange puzzles, monsters, and, of course, mummies.

To keep it short, the party fought through various challenges and faced off against an ancient evil demi-power whose return would threaten the sanity of the world. In all the brouhaha they found a sarcophagus made of solid gold. The party leader, being a dedicated Fighter, saw loot galore! The Cleric and the Mage wanted time to study the strange runes adorning the golden visage at the head of the gold coffin, but were overruled. ‘No time now for your pursuits of intellect,’ agreed the Ranger and Fighter.

"No problem, I have an large and empty bag of holding," the Ranger said.

So, problem solved, the sarcophagus would be put away for study and sales for a later time. In the meantime I wrote it down and earmarked the page in my notes.

Little did the party know that the obligatory mummy that exist in every pyramid was in the coffin.

Months in game time (and the real world) passed. When on a mission by none other than Death himself to retrieve his Scythe did thought of the golden coffin return. After battling a lich's minion, the very battered party found that part of the loot on the undead creature was a brooch, which was in fact a Scarab of Death. After the horrid thing ate the heart out of the Cleric, some realized they needed to put it inside a container tougher than a backpack.

"Dude, I still have this big sarcophagus from that pyramid!" exclaimed the Ranger.

"So we can put it in there, AND we have the money to resurrect our healer!" said the party leader.

Without further ado the Ranger pulled out the sarcophagus and opened it. Needless to say the look of horror was priceless.

Word to the wise, when looting in a pyramid, always check your sarcophagus.

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